Disneyland 2009

Gabby and I went to Disneyland last week. For some reason, getting a blog entry in has not been easy. The first one I did was deleted and not saved. Gabs and I drove down last Wednesday and made it to Anaheim by 4:30. We shared a suite with the Andersons. It was great seeing them and getting away for a few days. Gabby has been talking for months about going to Disneyland and I had been milking it for all it was worth. Now I need something else for her to look forward to so as to "encourage" good behavior. I hope Gabby will remember this trip better than the last one!

Gabby and I went over the first night. My camera has a night function, but I don't think I was using it right.

We rode the carousel a few times, Gabby would always name her pony. It was Polly every time.

Princess Gabby and Thomas. They got along really well. That morning Gabby said to Thomas, "You can be my prince, Thomas. I'm the princess and we'll get married." Thomas replied, "Okay, but we have to get married in the temple."

On the submarine for Finding Nemo

The Andersons on the Teacups

The Playhouse Disney Show. Gabby and Thomas were really into it.

Gabby begged and begged to get her face painted. We waited in line for 30 minutes while she carefully studied all her choices.

The final product. She thought she was "it" with her face painted.

It was really crowded at Disneyland for the end of February. We had to wait about 30 minutes for all but a couple of rides. The lines to meet the characters were long as well so we didn't get to meet everyone. Gabby had a good system though. I would tell her just to wave and say hi. Gabby would scream at the top of her lungs, "Hey Mickey (or Minnie, whichever it was)! HI!!! It's me, Gabby!!!" She was so loud, they always looked up and waved. Gabby would then say, "Mommy,he likes me, huh?" I always noticed that other kids without similar vocal capabilities would look enviously at Gabby receiving acknowledgement.

We rode the Teacups a lot!

Monica Sattley and me. Monica lived in Little Rock way back when and lives in Southern Cali now. She brought her girls to play with us on Friday. Gabby and Miriam had a great time and I enjoyed catching up with Monica

Brynn, Miriam, and Gabby

Riding Dumbo

The cousins waiting to go to Disney for the morning

Marji and me with Mickey and Minnie. Beat waiting in line!

Gabby really liked the Storybook Village ride and sailing through Monstro's mouth. We rode this one quite a few times. The trip was all about Gabby so I pretty much let her call the shots on the rides. I rode 3 "adult" rides, but I enjoyed watching Gabby's excitement more than anything.

Gabby talked and talked about Tigger and how nice he was. He picked her up for a big hug.

And danced with her. Nice crack shot, huh?

Riding Small World. They did some redesigns on it and it had just opened. The lines for it were out of control. I think Gabby must have remembered it from last time. She kept asking to ride it as soon as we got there. It was another favorite.

Playing music in Tarzan's Treehouse

This is just before we left for Cali. Gabby packed her backpack full of her Disney books. That's another quirk of Gabby, she will not watch Disney movies. Flat out refuses to view any of them, but she loves the books. That's how she knows all about them, solely through books. Yes, I'm growing a little bookworm :)

I've Been Published

Writing is very therapeutic for me. I have a lot of journals and writing is the best way for me to sort out things. I wrote this last summer and have shared it with a few people here and there. I shared it with Wally Goddard a couple of months ago. He writes a monthly column for Meridian Magazine and asked if I would mind having it published on their site.

I've mentioned before that I've felt a purpose to the things I experienced in my marriage. Abuse, in one form or another, is all too common today. I felt so ashamed and so alone for so long; it was such a marvel and miracle to realize that some of my heroes in the Book of Mormon experienced abuse as well. Sharing what I've learned and experienced further helps to heal me and I hope that my words can help someone else. I studied the Book of Mormon last year looking for the theme of deliverance through Christ, both temporally and spiritually. The Book of Mormon is so rich with teaching regarding this and my testimony of the truthfulness of it and being prepared for our day has only been strengthened.

So here's the link:

http://www.meridianmagazine.com/spiritjourney/090223soul.html

What's an idiot?

Most Utah drivers.

I suffer from a mild case of road rage. I think a better term is road irritation as I rarely escalate to all out rage. Controlling the irritation is especially not easy in Utah as I've blogged previously with regard to yellow lights and the use of blinkers. Another irritation stems from round-abouts. They're everywhere here. I do not understand how the same state that produces a plethora of drivers that runs red lights also produces a bevy of drivers that stops at yield signs in round-abouts when there aren't any cars in it or those who stop in the round-about when they have the right-of-way. I drive through a round-about every day so it's a bit of a pet peeve.

I don't always set the best example for Gabby when I drive. Whenever I honk at someone (by the way, I honk my horn judiciously to prevent overuse), Gabby informs me that it's not nice to honk the horn. I explain to her that horns are for honking especially at stupid people who drive dangerously. She tells me I need to be nice. I think we're both right. Horns are for honking and I should be nice.

When I experience road irritation, I do a bit of grumbling and honking. Today, another car completely cut me off (no blinker, obviously relying on telekinesis that I have yet to tap into) and slammed on their brakes all inside an intersection. I refrained from honking my horn, but yelled, "Stupid idiot!"

"Mommy, what's a stupid idiot?"

"Gabby, an idiot is someone who can't drive and is stupid."

"But Mommy, I like Indians and they can drive cars and I don't think they're stupid."

"Oh." Laughter.

Oops. Point taken. I will no long be shouting idiot to avoid such confusion in the future. I thought about shouting moron, but she may confuse that with Mormon and conclude that Indians and Mormons are all bad drivers. I considered, dummy, but Gabby could confuse that with dumbo and elephants are her favorite. I've now come up with shouting, "UTAHN!" Perhaps I'll even add "driver" to it for clarification.**

**I am 100% certain that none of my Utah friends are the bad drivers described above so none of this rant is in any way directed to you! I know that each of you is absolutely brilliant in every way :).


P.S. Jen and I went to see He's Just Not That Into You on Friday at The District at 9pm. We enjoyed it and with my venture into the dating world, I found much relevance in it. Anyway, there were small children running all over that theatre. Seriously, we hoped there was some kind of party or event as we could barely push through the hoardes of kids. Who knew that was the happening place on Friday night for 5 year olds. And would any of you consider this movie a family show? I don't think I'm a prude, but there were several families with kids, I mean like 9 or 10 year olds out to see the show. Maybe it's just me and Jen, but we didn't consider it to be a family movie in the least. Oh and there was the usual clapping and hollering during the previews. Yeah, the next Harry Potter looks good, but why clap and shout for the preview? I will never get it!

My Excellent Girl

Gabby has redeemed herself after last week's meltdown. I write this hoping that me bragging on her won't jinx her! Punishing her wasn't a fun for either of us, but I'm glad that it was effective quickly. Her teachers and classmates were all impressed by how good she was the rest of the week. She was even rated 'excellent' a couple of days. When I picked her up each day, she was so excited to tell me how good she was and would list all the things that she wouldn't have to do without since she was good.

Last Saturday, I was wearing my BYU hat while Gabby and I ran errands. Gabby was really upset that she didn't have a BYU hat as well. And yes, it did my heart good that she was so sad about it. I told her we'd look for one at Target. Well, they didn't have any BYU hats, but she settled for Tinkerbell. Oh and I am planning supplanting Tink with a BYU hat as soon as I find one. Gabby says she still wants one and I'm not one to deprive a true blue Cougar fan of paraphernalia.

Gabby loves any holiday. I have paper hearts covering my walls upon her insistence. I spent a good deal of yesterday morning cutting them out under Gabby's direction. Gabby has her Valentine Day cards complete and is just waiting for the big day to give them to her friends.

Serenity Now!

Gabby has entered a new phase that I'm prayerful and hopeful will be of short duration. When I picked her up from school on Friday, her teacher told me she'd had a rough day. I think she down-played just how rough it was. When I asked her about it, she became upset and seemed remorseful. She apologized to her teachers and I withdrew a couple of privileges from her that she usually has.

She was with her dad Friday night and most of Saturday. She was good for me Saturday night when she got home. She normally is. She pushes her limits, I don't always do the best job of being as firm as I should on everything. I pick my battles. On Sunday, I was more or less expecting her to act out in class as she does so about once a month and she was past due. She made it all the way through until the last 5 minutes when I recognize her blood-curdling screams while sitting in my class. I go out to be told she was running around like a crazy person and refusing to listen to her teachers. I dragged her home kicking and screaming and she was sent to her room when we got home.

Then there was today! I had just gone to lunch and was beginning to eat my usual cheese and crackers when Gabby's daycare called. I was told to come get her as she just wouldn't behave and they had tried everything. Not the call I wanted to get. I go to the school and was horrified to hear of and see the trouble she caused. I took her home and she's had every thing that wasn't necessary taken from her. She hasn't been happy about any of it, no treats, no shows, no games, no stories. I've put her to work hoping she gets that the fun stops as soon as the bad behavior begins. She seems to be getting it. She's spent most the day crying with me telling her no to all that she asks to have or do and making her tell me why I'm saying no.

I have a few ideas about the cause of the behavior. Somethings are just outside my control and I just have to make the best of it. So I'll just work on what I can and hope this phase will be short-lived. I admit, I've done my fair share of crying today as well. I can't help but feel like I'm a bad mother when Gabby acts this way and I can't quite figure out why or how to help her improve immediately. I feel a fair amount of guilt at times being a single mom, whether I should or not, and for being unable to give Gabby the life I feel she deserves. Don't worry, it passes. I know that I'm meant to be Gabby's mother, I know that the course I've taken is the right one, and I know that I'm not alone in loving and wanting the best for my little girl. It's just been one of those days! Here's hoping tomorrow will be better!

My First Love: Lost and Found

A girl never truly gets over her first love. That first love will always retain a special place in the heart. Memories grow fonder and sweeter with the passage of time. When you stumble across old photos, saved mementos, or journal entries, that same rush of nervous and hopeful expectation with butterflies in the tummy returns. I was 12 when I found my first love: BASKETBALL. So indulge me as I walk down memory lane with my first love!

In 7th grade, you had the option to do Athletics which would be basketball and track or P.E. I opted for Athletics mostly for track as I was a fast kid. I fell fast and hard for basketball though. I didn't know a thing about it before 7th grade. I worked hard and would practice at home. I wanted so badly to be a starter on the Gold team as that was the better team. I did work my way to being a starter on the Blue team. I'll never forget the first and only "game" between the Gold and Blue team for all our adoring fans (families). The final score was 8-2 Gold and I was only one to score on the Blue team.

I was hooked. I was watching the NBA and college ball all the time. I went to basketball camp at UCA completely on my own that summer after 7th grade. I was in heaven playing basketball 24/7 for 6 days. I greatly improved and was part of the starting 5 in 8th grade. Well, I was for the Thursday games, I wouldn't go to Sunday practices so I didn't start for the Monday games. The stat I remember from that year was fouling out 5 out of the 10 games and crying every time. I went to 2 basketball camps the next summer.

Our 9th grade team was pretty good. We were county champs and I loved every minute of every game. I was getting better about not fouling out and if I did I would manage not to cry. I still feel bad for crying during a game when Coach Roberts yelled at me. He was an intense coach known for throwing a clipboard if provoked and I think he'd often forget he was dealing with hormone-ravaged teenagers.

I loved my varsity coach, Coach White. I was on the varsity team as a 10th grader. I fully expected to never play that season being a lowly sophomore. During the first game though, she looked down the bench and pointed at me. A junior sitting next to me jumped up to go in only to be told to sit and that I should go in. I was nervous, but it was that kind of nervous that enhances playing. I played in a lot of varsity games much to my pleasure. All but 1 of the juniors on the team quit that year due in part to Coach White playing the sophomores ahead of them.

So my junior year, there weren't any seniors on the team. Expectations were low for such young team. The first game that season was one of the most memorable for me. We were playing Cutter Morning Star. We were 2 points down, seconds left on the clock, and I launch a hail-mary 3 just before the buzzer and was fouled. Game is over and I have 3 shots to either lose, win, or tie the game. There are few experiences I've had that were more exhilarating and surreal than having a gym full of people chanting your name. Coach White started to give me some tips but stopped herself and only said, "I know you'll make them." I step to the line and the silence is as deafening as the shouting had been. I dribble, square up, shoot and it's perfect! Two more to go. I do it all over again with the same results and am tackled by my teammates to the floor. That's the moment every player dreams of and practices for and I was lucky enough to have it. I missed the 3rd free throw as my nerves were shot by then but we won in overtime.

We had a great team by my Senior year. Unfortunately, we didn't always play to our potential and I believe we finished 17-7. My favorite and best game that year was against Arkadelphia (that's a real town for your non-Arkansans). It was a home game and we'd lost the 1st game to them on their turf due to the help of some hometown reffing. Well, it just so happened that there was a ref who thought I was hot and was reffing that night. I admit, I flirted and batted my eyes before the game. I was committed to winning and flirting with men twice my age wasn't beneath me. So I shot 12 free throws that game, made 9 and scored 17 overall so perhaps the flirting worked. Four other girls on our team scored in double digits and we won 77-70 so it was definitely more than the reffing. That's a high score for a high school basketball game. It was one of those games where everything worked almost seamlessly for our team. Being part of team and playing like that is an incredible experience.

We went to State that year and the first game was at home. We had a chance to win at the end of the game and I turned the ball over by passing the ball to the guard before she'd crossed the half court. It broke my heart and I cried and cried over it. I went off to college and left basketball and a piece of my heart behind. I played some intramural at BYU. After that, I never really played too much.

Senior Year, 1996. Go Lady Rams!

Well a few weeks ago, they announced that our stake would be having women's basketball every Thursday night. I was all over it. I played 2 weeks ago and stunk it up. I admit I was a bit ashamed by throwing up some air balls. I'm still an intense player and it's difficult to curb the competitive side of me. It's just second nature to go after that ball at all costs without regard to anyone who may be in my path. It was still so much fun to be on the court again though falling seems to hurt a bit more now. I had to miss last week but made it back tonight.

My team just rocked it out! I think everyone scored on my team. I know it was just church ball and I'm nowhere near to being the player I used to be, but it's part of that first love thing. When you come back to it, it's just so familiar, comfortable, exciting, and invigorating to be with it again. I just love it! I love playing defense and making steals and blocks. I love fast breaks and the knot of fear that accompanies every attempt of wide-open lay-up. That's the worst shot to miss! I love posting up, blocking out, and knocking girls down with the sheer power of my hips. I love back door passes for a quick shot. I love diving on the floor after a loose ball. I love wrestling the ball out of another player's hands. I love everything about it! It's so fun to play again, rusty as I am. I'm so happy to rediscover my first love!

The final score tonight. Yay Park 1st and 2nd Ward!

It Starts!

I must have gotten a little too comfortable. One of the many things that made last January so memorable was due to Gabby's many illnesses. I was just beginning to hope we'd make it through the month without her getting sick. No such luck as she has an ear infection. Luckily, she doesn't have a fever or anything else and should have a quick recovery.

Gabby ABHORS medicine of any kind. I think it goes back to the first year of her life. The first 4 months were very medically eventful and we spent a lot of time at the pediatricians, hospitals, and getting tests done. The less invasive and less expensive solution to one of her problems was to be on antibiotics for a year. She never grew accustomed to having medicine forced down her throat and still puts up a worthy fight whenever medicine of any sort is presented. Now, she's old enough that I can bribe, I mean, "reason" with her most the time. Well, her ear was hurting her and she was crying and crying. I had some ear drops that I got the OK to give her. I decided sneaking them in would be the best course as she flipped out when I shone a light in her ear. I managed to drop one drop in and held her down to get another in her ear. Gabby has quite a temper. She screamed, "Don't you touch me!" She ran upstairs to her room, slammed the door and howled until the drops did their work. It took another 10 minutes before she let me snuggle her and held my hair. I blame Utah's abysmal air quality. Gabby had never had an ear infection until her first winter here a year ago. My throat has a constant tickle and my eyes will burn. I never thought I'd say this, but I hope it snows to clear this up!

Gabby loves cheddar cheese sliced off the block. I was about to slice her some the other night when she told me she wanted the whole block. I was about to cut her a chunk off, but she was so offended I just gave her the block. It cracked me up watching her gnaw on it.

We're making progress in the naked department! This was 8pm and she was still clothed. She's staying clothed until bath or bedtime about half the time now! She still refuses to wear jammies, but at least she's staying clothed a bit longer now!